Five things you learn as a Brit in Perth

The Aussie life isn’t too much of a culture shock for us Brits (think England with nicer scenery, hotter weather, better food and more alcohol), but there are a few key things that differentiate Pommies from our much-beloved Aussie allies. Having lived in Perth for a few months now, I’ve learnt a lot about the land of Oz (I’m talking Australia, not the movie). So if you’re planning on giving up the UK for a stint down under, here’s a few things you might need to know about the Australian way of life before you make the big move!

Sunday is not a rest day

Move to Perth and be prepared to swap your lazy Sunday for a Sunday session. That’s right, Sunday is not a rest day in Australia…it’s a rave day. And you’ve never seen a queue like the line for OBH on a Sunday afternoon. I’m all for late weekend drinking, but just be prepared for the Monday struggles…especially if you’ve made it all the way to Claremont!

Birds are not your friends

If you thought getting shat on by a pigeon in the UK was a problem, just you wait until you meet the Australian wildlife! The birds over here have no qualms with getting a little too close for comfort. One week after moving, and I’d already been swooped by two overly aggressive magpies. Just think of Australian birds as English birds on steroids.

Tip: wear eyes on the back of your head (literally)!

Coffee is never just coffee

Until the age of 22, I only knew of two coffee varieties going….instant and filter. Having moved to Perth, I’ve discovered that Australia is home to a ridiculous amount of coffee combos…and each style of coffee has at least three styles of its own (a decaf, soy flat white is apparently a thing). Oh, and you can request different coffee temperatures (seriously, what is this place). I’m never a fan of a coffee snob, but if I could thank Perth for one thing, it would be the invention of the flat white….praise the coffee Gods!

Don't order doubles

You may be used to getting two doubles for £2.50 as a student in the UK (thanks TigerTiger), but doubles aren’t the done thing in Australia. Why? Because they’ll break your wallet as well as your liver! I learnt this the hard way….ordering two double vodka lemonades on a Saturday night - $48 and a couple of voms later and my bank account had little to thank me for! I knew Australia was expensive, but that’s excessive even for Perth!  

How to merge

Or not….because apparently no-one actually knows how to do it here anyway! Well done to whoever came up with the concept of merging, and subsequently applied it to all roads in WA - thanks for absolutely nothing! If I have to drag race another twat and his trailer, I’m going to lose my sh*t!

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